YEAH, RIGHT!

[ebtb.livejournal.com]

The audacity of some people, I swear... here's a request via a webform we got this morning...

First Name: jack
Last Name: andthebeanstalk
Company: na
Telephone: 911

Question/Comment:
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Evaluating/Purchased: Evaluated.
How can i activate my software without purchasing it from your company?? hhehe

---------------------------------------------------------------------

You can send us $19.95, douchebag. hhehe

Comments

[tadiera.livejournal.com]

I gotta say... the 'hhehe' is a nice touch. :D

[genjutsu-01.livejournal.com]

haha, the cheek of some people

you cant help but laugh tho :p

[ximinez]

A few years ago, I worked at a software company that had public forums for most support functions. We were small enough that the devs handled most of the communication on the forums directly. Some short time after we released an update that closed a significant activation hole, there was a post which said something along the lines of:

"I installed the latest version, and now the crack I downloaded won't let me run the Pro version."

I replied: "I'm very happy to hear that."

[xforge.livejournal.com]

"Hmm, I dunno, jackass; how can you drive off in a brand new Ford Mustang without purchasing it from the dealer? You can't? Hey, wha'dya know, there's your answer!!"

[xforge.livejournal.com]

Reminds me of the jokers that yoosta log into The Palace (early proto-virtual world thingie) and walk into a room full of people, probably 1/4 of whom had a stake in the software company, and go "somebody gimme a crack code!!" And someone inevitably would go "Alt+F4 for a crack code" and they'd immediately vanish as their software quit.

[kait-the-great.livejournal.com]

My office mate got this one:

Jerk: I live next to your campus and I pick up your wireless network but I don't have a password to log in.

Jim: Well the network is for students, staff, and faculty only. If you don't have a password, you can't use it.

Jerk: So do you know any way to get around the authentication page?

Jim: Even if I did, why would I tell you?

Jerk: I'll give you $10.

Jim: SLAM

[xforge.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I been doin' this a while...

[jecook]

nonono.....

This is where you tell them they have to deliver it in person, and have the cops waiting there to arrest them for attempting to bribe you to break into the network, and attempt to break into the network. ::snicker::

[floatingpencil.livejournal.com]

I remember doing similar things to people begging for ops on IRC. I never could believe how often it worked.

[taleya.livejournal.com]

Dear Valued Customer

Thank you for your submittal to our technical support database.

Your IP has been logged, and we hope you enjoy your stay in a federal PMITA prison for piracy

*smooch*

[megpie71.livejournal.com]

Dear Mr Andthebeanstalk,

We attempted to telephone you earlier, but you were not available. Unfortunately, the service you request is one of our premium services, and will require a regular payment of $1000 per week to ensure that your activation remains current. Please provide us with a current mailing address, as this code will need to be delivered through the postal service. We will also require your full name, and date of birth.

Sincerely,

A. Tech.

[bubosquared.livejournal.com]

For a brief while, I used to do Customer Service support for a large, well-known software company. One slowish day, I found an e-mail in the Dutch inbox from a bloke who was, he said, setting up his own photography business, and asked if $Company could send him a free copy of $FlagshipPhotoeditingSoftware. "I just want the CDs and a key, I don't need the manuals or anything!" Heh, nice try, but no. I e-mail back explaining that he pays for the licence, not the manuals, which are only included in PDF format anymore anyway. I was nice and polite, and explained why what he was asking wasn't as reasonable as he seemed to think, which I didn't need to do, but I figured I'd be nice and give him the benefit of the doubt that he was genuinely confused about what he pays for when buying a piece of software.

Received an irate e-mail back proclaiming tersely that he'd have no choice but to use a pirated copy, then, so there! I turned to my teammates, demanded to know if this bloke was serious, and received a pat on the head for being naive. And then I reported him on the fraud-reporting page, because I'm not in a position to get self-righteous about piracy, but this was just too much.

</ramble>

So, yeah. People: STUPID!

[seattleotaku.livejournal.com]

Way back when... If you're at home, you type '+++' then type "ATH"(enter).

NO CARRIER

:)

[xforge.livejournal.com]

Heh, yup, pulled that one a couple times too.