(no subject)

[the-ninja-style.livejournal.com]

This just happened:

Customer was accidentally transferred to me, so I transfered on but not before his account popped up. I usually ignore it, but saw he had a novel for notes. I decided to see why. This proved to be more entertaining than "Subs phone still out." Here are some of the highlights.

Sub called in saying outlet is ruined. Sub says his mother-in-law ripped the modem out of the wall and threw it into the yard.
Sub thinks the modem will still work if we can replace outlet. Gave sub free install for this.

Sub calls back in, his mother-in-law ripped the modem out again, claiming the internet is only for porn and that he's cheating on her daughter via net. This time she LIT THE MODEM ON FIRE in the front yard. Sub needs new outlet, and new modem. Advised sub he would have to pay for modem. Sub agreed.

Sub angry that modem cost $120. Said he could buy one cheaper at Walmart. Explained to sub what a high risk customer is and also pointed out he signed agreement to buy modem. Sub says he didn't know what he was signing, he just signed it. Told sub that is no excuse, and must pay bill. Sub angry but agreed to pay.

Sub says tech didn't arrive with modem. Notes on job state differently. Suggest sub check with neigbor. Sub says he's been home all day. Woman in background started screaming that she hid the modem. Sub said he was tired of being married and asked if I was familiar with any divorce lawyers in his area. Disco'd call.

Woman claiming to be Sub's wife called in. Says she wants to disco all services. Sub could not verify subs SS#, address, or even spell the last name right.

Sub calls in to complain about his mother-in-law trying to disco services. Confirmed with sub services were not discoed. Sub now has password protected account.

Woman says she is subs wife. Can not give password to account. Offers me $1000 if I allow her access to account. Cold disco on caller.

Comments

[agentdanak.livejournal.com]

Woah.

[lihan161051.livejournal.com]

Sounds like the sub's mother in law needs a bill for the cost of the modem, the outlet (twice, apparently), and a legal consult for the attorney, plus maybe a restraining order.

MIL probably wouldn't be amused to find that this story is circulating on the Internet ..

[chaobell]

Wow. That is a special kind of crazy, there.

[red-scully.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAHAHA. What a freakish household that must have been...

[lihan161051.livejournal.com]

Oh, and it sounds like this story is as applicable to dark_christian as it is here. :) Given that the MIL seems to be sure enough about what's right and wrong for everyone else that she's willing to vandalize the sub's property and bribe you guys a grand or so to try to social-engineer a DOS attack on his account, she sounds like a God Warrior if ever there was one. And if "wife" really is the wife and not the MIL pretexting, then yeah, I'd say it's long past time for him to get out ..

[coyoteden.livejournal.com]

[canray.livejournal.com]

And that, gentlebeings, is why I'm not married.

That, and I'm a Computer Nerd with no social life.

[taleya.livejournal.com]

holy crap, just garnered a whoooooooole new appreciation for my other half's mum.

(He on the other hand, just garnered a whooooole new appreciation why I don't leave my mother alone with him)

[canray.livejournal.com]

The In-Law hasn't signed for the account, and thus is not responcible for the Equipment. Legally at least.

Morally, she's a Black Hole to begin with, so what the hey.

[canray.livejournal.com]

Short Bus To The Insane Asylum!

[toxico.livejournal.com]

...can't ...help it ...anymore:

"GRAB YOUR DICK AND DOUBLE-CLICK, FOR PORN PORN PORN!"

[cadey.livejournal.com]

[ex-deliveryboy.livejournal.com]

I laughed my ass off when I saw that strip.

[hangar.livejournal.com]

Seconded.

[duality.livejournal.com]

Sub now has password protected account.

i think my favorite password protected account we had was one pharma rep who had two teenagers. they'd keep trying to use his company computer (because it had the high speed on it, paid by employer). they would even go so far as to call as him to get the password reset so they could get online. we finally set up his account code at the helpdesk where we wouldn't assist whoever was on the phone unless they answered a trivia question. it was something along the lines of "what baseball team won the 1978 world series." those kids called up for weeks throwing out various team names. they'd get all upset because they went and researched it to find the correct answer and would try to argue. dad was very smug about all this.


the real answer was "who cares?"

[skylion.livejournal.com]

Forgive the n00b, but "disco"?

[the-ninja-style.livejournal.com]

It means disconnect. We call a cold disco when we hang up the customer (or Sub) :)

[ravenshrinkery.livejournal.com]

I must admit I still think of Sub in an entirely (but arguably more wishfully appropriate) different context... not that clue would likely be imparted any faster...

[shirenomad]

Given that the MIL seems to be sure enough about what's right and wrong for everyone else that she's willing to vandalize the sub's property

Or a PETA member.

[wherdafux-d-cat.livejournal.com]

HA! Trekkie Monster and hot, sweaty puppet sex -- what a way to spend a night on the town!

[brotherflounder]

Glad I'm not the only one who thought of that.

What? I like Broadway.

>_>;

[siliconshaman.livejournal.com]

Whoa, that's putting the fun back into dysfunctional! [at least from our stand point]...

Oh, and I'd have at least told him where to look up divorce lawyers...
customer service an' all that! [besides making life easier for the next poor s.o.b to answer a call from that subs].

dr. pepper | nose >keyboard

[jecook]

*dies laughing*

[divavee.livejournal.com]

So that's what you're doing at work when I'm not there....

[bekscilla.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, I love the answer for that one :D

[arpad.livejournal.com]

Well, he definitely could not Google divorce lawyers without the modem :) Should have had to advise him to use phone book instead.

[arpad.livejournal.com]

THAT was evil :)

[vulpisfoxfire.livejournal.com]

But...the story's not porn! Why would it be on the internet? ;-)

[misfit4leaf.livejournal.com]

Me too!

...all of my major relationships started on the interwebs...


.........where'd I hide the whiskey?

[duality.livejournal.com]

I used to get a chuckle every time I got to say "ok, now just submit" over the phone.

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

Mmm, it would technically be an insurance claim like theft or B+E, I suppose. Unless the insurance contract didn't cover people living in the same house, sort of thing.

[spooforbrains.livejournal.com]

That's genius.

And I'm also reminded of Leisure Suit Larry ...