Me being a Wisearse...
May. 7th, 2007 04:18 pmBack in my phone days, we would have to do the nice, traditional "Get the phone number" from people who have already pressed it in fifteen times (Literally at one job. :-S).
Sometimes, they think I'm just a machine again, and type it in using the phone, so, when that happened, I'd do this:
Me: "Hello, thank you for calling *HELL!*, my name is CanRay, and can I please have your phone number, starting with the area code."
Phone: Boop, boop, beep, bap, bap, bap, bapboobbapbap
Me (In best "Computer Voice"): "Thank you. Now accessing your account. I am sorry, I cannot access your account as I'm a human being and don't speak 'Phone', please speak to me your telephone number starting with the area code."
Most people chuckled or apologised. One person, however, was just too ticked off to realize what I was saying, and just kept punching in the number, three times in a row. I'd had a bad day as well, so followed it up with: "I am sorry, we are unable to bring up your account due to your inability to speak your phone number starting with the area code. Thank you for calling *HELL!*."
Hey, if you're not going to listen to the nice human being when you finally get one, why bother going through the voice mail?
Sometimes, they think I'm just a machine again, and type it in using the phone, so, when that happened, I'd do this:
Me: "Hello, thank you for calling *HELL!*, my name is CanRay, and can I please have your phone number, starting with the area code."
Phone: Boop, boop, beep, bap, bap, bap, bapboobbapbap
Me (In best "Computer Voice"): "Thank you. Now accessing your account. I am sorry, I cannot access your account as I'm a human being and don't speak 'Phone', please speak to me your telephone number starting with the area code."
Most people chuckled or apologised. One person, however, was just too ticked off to realize what I was saying, and just kept punching in the number, three times in a row. I'd had a bad day as well, so followed it up with: "I am sorry, we are unable to bring up your account due to your inability to speak your phone number starting with the area code. Thank you for calling *HELL!*."
Hey, if you're not going to listen to the nice human being when you finally get one, why bother going through the voice mail?
no subject
Date: 2007-05-07 10:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-08 01:59 am (UTC)If a bunch of people from the same area call due to "No Service" the machine can eventually figure out, "HEY! There's an OUTAGE!" and automatically declair it.
This, however, typically doesn't work, and we're stuck trying to explain to people that while we're booking the appointment for three months in advance, it's going to be fixed a hell of a lot sooner. Maybe.
Sometimes the Robots do transfer it to the monkey on the phone, sometimes it doesn't.
I think the times that it doesn't are sure signs you've just been outsourced.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-08 02:38 am (UTC)But yeah it bugs me when I have to repeat something (like a Dell service code) to the tech support dude after I type it for their phone system.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-08 03:00 am (UTC)The number of calls I got from people at work, at other houses, and so on.
It also doesn't include people who only use a Cell Phone.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-08 03:22 am (UTC)The thing about dell's line still bugs me though. They have this nice little alphanumeric service tag for everything. Except the automated portion of the support line, that needs this other bigger number cause the phone can't do letters very easily.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-08 03:50 am (UTC)At one point, I had actually figured out the algorythm that was used to generate the code.
I just use their web site instead of calling any more, because I can generally explain things better via email or via the chat thing-y.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-08 04:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-08 06:05 am (UTC)Enlightenment!