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May. 17th, 2001 09:13 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
bonecraft.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
techrecoveryI just had a customer call because the ENGLISH instructions in our installation kit were a bit too complicated. I'm sure third grade was tough too, bitch.
Here's your mission:
You have one DSL modem (As my customer and I have nicknamed the "black box")
You have one RJ-11 cable (Which my customer and I nicknamed the "regular telephone cable)
You have one CAT 5 cable (which my customer and I nickname "Looks like a regular phone cable.....but the end that you plug into the wall thingie is larger")
Now.....we need to plug the "Big cable" into the DSL modem where it says "Ethernet"
(she did that fine)
Then ....plug the end of the "Big cable" into the back of your computer.....
(took five minutes....but she did it)
Then.....take the "regular old phone cable" and plug it into the ONLY REMAINING PORT ON THE DSL MODEM.
(2 minute process....she wasn't sure if I meant the "big one" or the "regular one")
Then.....plug the "regular one" into the telephone jack that is located at the wall.
......now.......this last step....I have NO idea how she lost her cool from there.
"Wall jack?!?!?! .....oh shit.....now we're getting technical"
It spiraled into a conversation that kept me repeating "just plug the regular one you have in your hand into the wall jack in front of you that you plug your telephone into"
......and for SOOOOOME reason it spilled out into this massive networking political discussion involving how she:
"I plug my 56k modem into there" (Yes ma'am I know...now you plug your DSL into there)
"I'm a novice you'll have to forgive me" (I wasnt aware of that ma'am....just plug the fucking thing in already)
"Wait a second....*pause* This doesn't look right" (Oh christ kill me now)
"This looks just like the one I use for the 56k modem" (absofucking duh you loopy scab farmer)
"So why do I need this one?" (I am in hell)
"So it's the SAME as the one in my 56k modem? Then why'd you send it?" (Because we love you....plug it the fuck in now)
5 minutes later...explaining that the cables were no different.....she decided to just plug the one from her 56k modem into the dsl modem to the wall jack to avoid using the new cable......
......it's amazing how after 25 minutes they suddenly UNDERSTAND and the problem is solved.
........I'd rather do tech supports for dogs...at least then they eat their own shit and admit to it. Humans on the other hand hide the fact that they eat shit. There's something about that low IQ honesty I prefer, yanno?
Here's your mission:
You have one DSL modem (As my customer and I have nicknamed the "black box")
You have one RJ-11 cable (Which my customer and I nicknamed the "regular telephone cable)
You have one CAT 5 cable (which my customer and I nickname "Looks like a regular phone cable.....but the end that you plug into the wall thingie is larger")
Now.....we need to plug the "Big cable" into the DSL modem where it says "Ethernet"
(she did that fine)
Then ....plug the end of the "Big cable" into the back of your computer.....
(took five minutes....but she did it)
Then.....take the "regular old phone cable" and plug it into the ONLY REMAINING PORT ON THE DSL MODEM.
(2 minute process....she wasn't sure if I meant the "big one" or the "regular one")
Then.....plug the "regular one" into the telephone jack that is located at the wall.
......now.......this last step....I have NO idea how she lost her cool from there.
"Wall jack?!?!?! .....oh shit.....now we're getting technical"
It spiraled into a conversation that kept me repeating "just plug the regular one you have in your hand into the wall jack in front of you that you plug your telephone into"
......and for SOOOOOME reason it spilled out into this massive networking political discussion involving how she:
"I plug my 56k modem into there" (Yes ma'am I know...now you plug your DSL into there)
"I'm a novice you'll have to forgive me" (I wasnt aware of that ma'am....just plug the fucking thing in already)
"Wait a second....*pause* This doesn't look right" (Oh christ kill me now)
"This looks just like the one I use for the 56k modem" (absofucking duh you loopy scab farmer)
"So why do I need this one?" (I am in hell)
"So it's the SAME as the one in my 56k modem? Then why'd you send it?" (Because we love you....plug it the fuck in now)
5 minutes later...explaining that the cables were no different.....she decided to just plug the one from her 56k modem into the dsl modem to the wall jack to avoid using the new cable......
......it's amazing how after 25 minutes they suddenly UNDERSTAND and the problem is solved.
........I'd rather do tech supports for dogs...at least then they eat their own shit and admit to it. Humans on the other hand hide the fact that they eat shit. There's something about that low IQ honesty I prefer, yanno?
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