techrecovery | Sure I'll give you a credit! (Reply)

Sub (subscriber) calls in. Has been down legit for about 6 hours. Its his first call.

S: Penny pinching subscriber
M: Me, your humble, yet loveable, cable company tech rep

(After fixing his connection problem)

M: Is there anything else I can help you with today? (The script from hell)
S: Yeah, I want a credit for not having the connection for all this time.
M: Certainly sir, I just need a few moments to process this.
(insert sound of me figuring out how much how much credit for 6 hours, then processing it)
M: Your credit is processed, and will appear on your next bill.
S: How much was it?
M: 29 cents.
S: WHAT?! I PAY YOU PEOPLE A HUNDRED BUCKS A MONTH, AND YOU CREDIT ME 29 CENTS!
M: Sir, you have our Triple play package. You pay 33.34 for TV, 33.33 for internet, and 33.33 for phone. Only the internet was down. So I can only justify a credit for that. And dividing your monthly bill by 30 days, then 24 hours per day, and multiplying by 6 for the number of hours you were down, comes out to 28.2 cents. I rounded up to 29.
S: I WANT YOUR SUPERVISOR RIGHT NOW!
M: Certainly sir, please hold.

My super didn't give him another cent. She always backs us to the hilt. That's why we adore her.