From the inbox...

[crazdgamer.livejournal.com]

Personally, beyond the obvious misuse of a modulator-demodulator, I have to question the use of the OMG HIGH IMPORTANCE tag.

(And also, why did this have to go through [dept_worker] to begin with? Why not directly e-mail the tech group (which is the de-facto SOP anyway)?

What the e-mail doesn't say is that the computer in question is FUBAR and out of warranty.

It's good to have your priorities in order, I guess.

Anyway, see below.

Good Morning, Please help us with the following request and advise ASAP. Thank you.



[dept_worker]
[sig]



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [dept-head_secretary]
Sent: Wednesday, September 20, 2006 9:29 AM
To: [dept_worker]
Cc: [tech_guy]; [dept-head]
Subject: Computer for Intern
Importance: High



Good Morning [dept_worker],



[dept-head] is requesting a new modem (flat screen) for [intern] and if possible to be installed by this afternoon in order that she may work on it when she comes in on Thursday. Please make arrangements for this. Thank you.



[dept-head_secretary]

Comments

[vulpine137.livejournal.com]

Umm, flat screen modem ?

Dept-head needs to be removed from dept-ass ?

[hisamishness.livejournal.com]

I'd be tempted to find the smallest, flatest modem... or a modem with a flat LCD screen on the front... drop it off with a copy of the email request attached.

[revchris.livejournal.com]

Do the new flat-screen modems support a higher resolution than the old tube-style ones? Somebody told me that if I get higher resolution I can download bigger pictures.

[hisamishness.livejournal.com]

don't laugh... a business associate of my girl's was sold an Extreme III CF card for her new camera because "it's like the film of a digital camera and better film means better picture quality"

[manuka.livejournal.com]

Totally.

[fragbert.livejournal.com]

I would happily sacrifice an lcd from a digital watch (or similar item), solder it to a 300 bps internal modem, wrap it in pink anti-static wrap and box it up.

[jecook]

::reaches for the vicoden::

That hurts just parsing that. They probably got bent over for it, too.

[hisamishness.livejournal.com]

Somewhat. Don't think they brought lube, but maybe a little spit was used.

[redqueenmeg.livejournal.com]

*cries*

[tecie.livejournal.com]

I keep reading that and wanting to drive to whatever best buy it is where salesman said that and beat him with a wiffleball bat because inevitably the customer who believed that line will hunt down one of their "tech friends" once it breaks -- and the customer won't have enough money to supply the six pack.

[darkblade1.livejournal.com]

You know I always think there's a limit to stupidity, but then I read the new stories every day and am pleasantly frightened.

[kait-the-great.livejournal.com]

My coworker says: Does she want a high-speed monitor to go with that?